Halloween Jokes Part 1


Halloween Jokes Part 1


There are lots of Halloween jokes out there. In fact, I had to make 2 Fridays of them. Here are this week’s jokes. [A repeat from last year.]



What kind of mail does a superstar vampire get?
Fang mail


Where does a vampire keep his money?
In a blood bank


What kind of dog does a vampire have?
A bloodhound


Why do vampires scare people?
They are bored to death


How can you tell a vampire likes baseball?
Every night he turns into a bat


What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
It’s a pain in the neck.


What do you give a vampire with a cold?
Coffin Drops!


Why did the vampire quit the baseball team?
They would only let him be BAT boy



What is a mummy’s favorite type of music?
Rap music.


What do you get when you cross a vampire with a mummy?
Either a flying bandage or a gift wrapped bat!


What do you call a mummy eating in bed?
A crummy mummy


What do you call a little monster’s parents
Mummy and Deady


Why don’t mummies take vacations?
They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.



What is a skeleton’s favorite instrument?
The trombone


What did the skeleton order with his drink?
A mop (I love this one!)


Why couldn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts


What do skeletons say before they start to eat?
Bone appetite


Why did the skeleton stand in the corner during his prom?
Because he had no body to dance with!


Why don’t skeletons play music in church?
They have no organs


How do you make a skeleton laugh?
Tickle its funnybone!


What does a skeleton orders at a restaurant?
Spare ribs



What is the problem with twin witches?
You never know which witch is which!


What do you call a nervous witch?
A twitch


What do witches put on their hair?
Scare spray


What do you call a witch’s garage?
A broom closet


Why does a witch ride a broom?
The vacuum cleaner’s power is cord it too short


What do they teach in witching school?


Need more Halloween jokes? No problem! Next week, I’ll have a bunch more, this time about vampires, ghosts and knock-knock jokes.


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